Waiting for change

By Rachel Pagdagdagan

“These leaders never get tired,” I told myself upon overhearing an early morning TV newscast about the Dec. 12 protest rally last year. My feet were no longer itching to spring up and see what my Grandma was watching, but I recognized familiar personalities being mentioned whom I recalled seeing during the historic EDSA People Power II way back when I was in high school. Almost eight years have passed and these leaders are now against the same person who was sworn in as the new president in front of the EDSA II crowd.

I was part of that crowd, one among the many thousands who genuinely felt that change was within reach for the country. Now, as I tried to finish the “ampalaya” [bitter gourd] con carne left over by my diabetic dad, I thought that only TV soap opera writers could have predicted this sad twist of fate.

“I have one thing to be thankful for,” I told my Grandma. “I’m glad I avoided the stretch of Ayala Avenue yesterday.”

Now that I am a member of the working class, I guess nobody can say I am ignorant of the many social problems happening around me. My pockets bleed from tax cuts on my salary and the high prices of commodities and utilities. My regular job has been greatly affected by the global economic crisis. I choose the Metro trains over buses, taxis and jeepneys, despite all the inconveniences of being locked in with a coachful of people because they are the most cost-effective means of transportation. The social class I belong to is very different from the class I left after my graduation from college, when receiving allowance from my mom was just one of my morning routines.

All these experiences should have made me more fervent in protesting and demanding that the government make life bearable for every Filipino. Instead, I think I am unconsciously taking the stand of majority of the Filipino youth today, especially the Friendster types: It’s so complicated.

I do not believe it is a feeling of helplessness. The combination of youth and idealism does not allow the word helplessness to enter our vocabulary or mess up our systems. We still believe that we can change the world whenever we want to. Before this not-so-different administration, the voice of the people was the voice of majority of the young leaders, activists and students who used cellphones for sending messages. On the other side of the world, it was also the youth that mobilized and successfully supported America’s famous change leader, Barack Obama, who won to his side six million young voters. With America in recession, young voter turnout increased from 9 percent in 2000 to 17 percent in the recent presidential elections, according to the Center for Information and Research on Civic Learning and Engagement.

Neither is it apathy. As the Philippine economy continues to lag amid the worldwide financial crisis, the youth will definitely get hit in one way or another. Many may not be able to find jobs or keep their jobs, if they are already employed. Others will see their mommies and daddies try even harder to make both ends meet. Still, others will hear sad stories from family members about how life is getting more difficult for them. One can never be apathetic when one is hurting. Water will sooner or later boil when placed over fire. The question for the youth is, when will we reach a boiling point? When do we say I want change now?

John Mayer captured the reason that I now have a different perspective (not indifference) on taking to the streets:

It’s not that we don’t care
We just know the fight ain’t fair

So we keep on waiting (waiting)
Waiting for the world to change.

Is waiting for the world to change better than protesting to bring about change? For a long time, Filipinos have been victims, whether wittingly or not, of different social plagues and problems. Had we waited longer than we did, our country would not have survived. I’ve been thinking, however, that maybe screaming our lungs out to pierce through the conscience of corrupt officials is not a sustainable strategy. We have ousted a tyrant and an incompetent leader, but soon forgot their offenses and elected their relatives and their clones. If our past efforts to reform the system bore no fruits, then I am letting a third chance to force change pass. Instead, I will just be waiting (waiting) for the right leader or an awakening perhaps to make reforms a reality.

I have always believed that this country needs more visionaries than politicians. If we cannot find a single one from among the leaders we have right now, then I am hoping that the Filipino youth would have the strong vision to search and find what is ahead for us instead of just asking what comes next.

When the time comes, I would be content to see my grandchild watching newscasts about other things instead of tiring reports about rallies, corruption and politics. Then I can tell her, “I have only one thing to be thankful for: I’m glad your generation was able to escape what seemed to be a never-ending cycle of corruption and economic stagnation.” And with a satisfied smile, I will ask her to finish my ampalaya con carne that my dad taught me how to cook.

Rachel Pagdagdagan, 24, handles technical communication projects for IT companies. She is taking her master’s in technology management at the University of the Philippines, Diliman.